Just A Little Off Kilter....

Some time ago, I declared my love for snacks and while poking around on Etsy for a picture of a snack or snack related item I stumbled upon this...   Snack Bar by Lord Obie via Etsy Would someone please, please tell me how this image is related to a snack? All I can think and imagine when I see this image is...  "Can't sleep, clowns will eat me" Am I the snack? Will the clown eat me as a snack? Shudder. What makes you shudder?

If you need me, I'll always be stuck behind the person who doesn't know how to use the self-checkout aisle.

How is it possible that, in just a couple of months you will be three. How could time move so fast? When I see you dancing and playing and singing and talking now, it is hard to believe that you were once the tiny baby I held in my arms. And back then, when I fell for you, I never imagined that I could adore you even more than I did in those first moments. But, I do. The more I watch you grow and develop, the more enamored I become with you. You are filled with energy and enthusiasm. I think you could spend an entire day jumping up and down with only small breaks for eating and napping. You love music, and when you hear a song you like, you will ask me to dance (which is surprising given my very poor dancing skills) . Then, when it’s over, you will clap your hands and say: “Yay! Good song!” You’re also a performer who does not mind an audience. You love vehicles of every variety, including but not limited to cars, trucks, airplanes, helicopters, and trains. At ever...

The potty training is oh so rewarding. Progress has been made and Lochlan is now potty trained both day and night. Our boy is a tiny potty using machine. One of Loch's favorite benefits of this new big boy underpants arrangement is his unprecedented easy access to his nether regions. LOCHLAN RECLINING (8:20 PM - Lochlan is relaxing on his bed as I retrieve book number seven. One of his hands rests casually inside of his pants. I enter from the hallway). ME What’s going on there buddy? LOCH I have my hand on my balls. ME Oh? LOCH (whispers) They are very fragile.

In the past couple of weeks, I’ve come across quite a few articles/stories wherein the mom/authors fess up to their mediocre parenting skills and while I admire the authors’ candid confessions, most of all because being average is not something about which any of us should be ashamed. Everybody can’t be excellent because then excellence would be the norm, and we all know that no one and nothing is perfect. If we could all agree that average is okay, then we could stop all the judging and insecurities and anxieties and just relax. Raising kids is tough for everyone, so why all the pretending like it isn’t? But as much as I appreciate the " I still have my baby weight and sometimes I spend too much time on my phone and also kind of lose my cool in public when my kids are behaving like animals", honesty, I also feel like the writers of those articles/stories (and all other parents out there) need to give themselves a big, fat break. And here’s why... You’re all damn good mo...

If there's another explanation for my gray hairs other than I'm turning into a polar bear, I don't want to hear it. Please don't ruin this for me.

As I look back on my life, I realize that many of the times I thought I was being rejected from someone or something I wanted, I was in fact being redirected to someone or something that I needed but seeing this when you’re in the midst of feeling rejected, however, is quite tough. I know because I’m there.   As soon as someone critiques, criticizes, and pushes you away...as soon as you are rejected...you find yourself thinking, “Well, that proves once again that I’m not worthy.” What you need to realize is, the other person or situation is not worthy of you and your particular journey.   What I've learned in my forty one (soon to be forty two years) is that rejection is necessary medicine. It teaches you how to reject relationships and opportunities that aren’t going to work, so you can find the right ones that will. It doesn’t mean you aren’t good enough; it just means someone else failed to notice what you have to offer. Which means you now have more time to improve ...

Just once, I'd like to open up my refrigerator and find cartoon versions of my favorite foods arguing over which one of them is healthier.

I’m sure most people have heard studies concerning cereals and sugar content. This was a particular disappointment because I eat Lucky Charms almost every morning for breakfast. The news about the possible unhealthiness quotient of this particular cereal lead me to some serious evaluation...for about five minutes in the grocery aisle. And then, I bought another box of the Lucky Charm variety. I should care more about this sort of thing, but alas, I have acquired poor self control when it comes to sugary goodness.   I am often endeavoring to make sweeping changes in my life that will somehow turn everything around and make me happier/full of energy and vibrance/an all around better human being... I will go to bed early and wake up early, too. I will cut back on my TV watching. I will stop worrying about small, insignificant things. I will eat more vegetables and whole grains. These are nice goals, but they stray too drastically from the life ...

Two nights ago at bed time, I attempted to introduce Lochlan to the concept of gratitude. It’s a good habit for him to form from an early age, and it is something that I want to incorporate into my own life, so why not combine the two by folding it into our bedtime routine? I have been a little blue lately, which is part of the reason I have been a little quiet here. I know, sharing might make me feel better, but often, I find myself opening Blogger, staring at the empty “New Post” box, waiting for inspiration that never arrives. So, being grateful for all the positives in my life is something I am hoping will help pick me up out of the blah. After we read "Mighty Dads" and "Goodnight, Goodnight Construction Site", turned on the noise machine, turned off the light, and sang Baby Beluga, I tried to talk to Lochlan about feeling appreciative of all the awesome things we have around us. I started listing some items before asking my little love for his picks. Without he...

In exactly one month, I’ll be 42. I don’t wear a lot of makeup but I recently mustered up the bravery required and walked into Sephora and walked out with a forty dollar tube of concealer. Bravery required you may be asking yourself...well once, I had a truly horrible and humiliating experience there with an eighteen year old and have avoided it since. Anyway, I walked in like a tourist trying to get my bearings and was met by a young woman with blonde cascading curls and massive dark eyelashes. “Can I help you?” she asked. I stepped back in an attempt to avoid her eyelashes. “I’m looking for something that will hide the dark circles under my eyes.” She observed me. I felt like a specimen under her microscope. She paused, then turned on her sky high heels (heels high enough that if I attempted to walk in, would result in a spectacular fall followed by a trip to the emergency department). “Follow me.” Head down I followed her. “Try this,” she said, pulling out a tube the size of Crazy G...

Happy 150th Birthday Canada