Fear, Miedo, Peur, Timor

Fear - noun - A distressing emotion aroused by impending danger, evil, pain, etc., whether the threat is real or imagined; the feeling or condition of being afraid. Synonyms: foreboding, apprehension, consternation, dismay, dread, terror, fright, panic, horror, trepidation, qualm. Antonyms: courage, security, calm, intrepidity.

To me, the words ‘‘fear” and “surgery” are inextricably connected. Not only that, but hospital stays in general are full of unfamiliar experiences that I'm sure can easily jeopardize even the strongest sense of emotional well being. To be a patient in the modern age means to give up control and place yourself in the hands of another, whose job it is to lead you through the maze of treatment options and back to recovery. I trust that I'll be looked after, that I will be safe and alright.

But...

I'm incredibly fearful of my upcoming surgery. As the date gets closer, I find myself waking up at night thinking about it. I find it creeping into my day at unexpected moments. It sits on my shoulder weighing me down. 

What I do is know is this - Fear is a choice. You actually choose to be afraid. And you can deliberately choose to live without it. All you have to do is make a conscious decision, a decision to not be afraid. When something stands in your way, you must ask yourself, what am I afraid of?

I am afraid...but I have faith that it will all be okay.