Have You Ever?

Have you ever thrown up at your fertility clinic? Well...now I can say that I did and I can also say that I was and am horribly embarrassed about it even though the techs in the lab were so sweet about it. Good thing they keep those cute little garbage cans next to each chair! Yeah...not my best moment for sure.

 A little back story....

 Today is 13 dpo and after the fiasco of my tests and blood draw at 6 dpo...I'm ready for a little boring but it would seem that's just not how Janet's body rolls yo. 
Top test is 11dpo, light line
Bottom test is yesterday 12dpo, pretty good line.
Also a positive on an Equate test
Because I'm a sucker for punishment and I have this problem wherein I pee on things...I took another test this morning along with a digital. The digital mocked me with "Not Pregnant" and the other test mocked me with it's lighter then yesterday line. Damn! 

 The hopeful side of my brain, quickly shouted out that it must be lighter because I was up at 1:30 in the morning to pee....yes, that's why! While the other rational, experienced part of my brain shouted out "You idiot...it's because this is another chemical". 

 The only good thing that I took away from this morning is that AF isn't here...28-29 day cycles and today is cycle day 30. I always get major breast tenderness after O, this time...zero. I never have cramps before AF, it usually just starts without any warning, this time...cramps that started at 10dpo. I have to admit...I feel like a fool...a silly, silly foolish girl that is grasping for straws. I am not happy with myself!


I did what I didn't want to do and that was call and request another beta. My thinking is that at least if this is another chemical the clinic will have a record and perhaps we can try and figure out why this keeps happening. Other than the usual blood work, I've never had any additional testing. Perhaps this might be useful?

Beta was drawn at 9:15 am...I'll know later today but I am preparing myself for bad news.

And this lovely peoples is the back story about why I threw up at my fertility clinic.
*Disclaimer...I threw up at the thought of yet another crushing disappointment...just so much heartache and disappointment*

 ...................................................................................................................................................................

 I popped home for  lunch and had a peek at the Clearblue test that I took this morning at the same time as the other test. It's been hours...evaporation line? 
What are the chances...this is 6 hours later!

Comments

  1. waiting and wishingFebruary 19, 2013 at 11:01 AM

    Holy cow, Janet! I'm sorry it's been such a roller coaster of a cycle. I'm still holding out hope fore this crazy cycle :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Just TFebruary 19, 2013 at 11:02 AM

    I feel so bad for you throwing up in the clinic. I bet the other ladies there were thinking, "look at her showing off with morning sickness" sorry I couldn't resist.

    Keeping my fingers crossed and holding out hope for you until told differently.

    ReplyDelete
  3. KelBelFebruary 19, 2013 at 11:18 AM

    Thinking of you and keeping my fingers crossed... xo

    ReplyDelete
  4. ChickenpigFebruary 19, 2013 at 11:18 AM

    Did you throw up because of nerves, or because of nausea? Because your body sure is acting pregnant. I hope they can get to the bottom of why you get positive pee tests, if you aren't actually pregnant. Will they do a full panel if you request it? Like fsh, Hcg, progesterone, estrogen...maybe? Because if you keep peeing on things and getting sort of pregnant answers you're going to go CRAZY. I've got everything crossed that you come back with a positive beta XXX!

    Sorry that you threw up :(

    ReplyDelete
  5. ousoonerchickFebruary 19, 2013 at 11:41 AM

    Good luck!!!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Mrs Green GrassFebruary 19, 2013 at 11:42 AM

    Good luck! I hope it's real and here to stay!

    ReplyDelete
  7. LizFebruary 19, 2013 at 11:52 AM

    That does not sound like fun throwing up at your clinic. Sorry you had to deal with that. Your 12dpo test looks good to me. Tests aren't a perfect measure of your hcg so try not to worry so much. I really hope you get good news today.

    ReplyDelete
  8. AshleyFebruary 19, 2013 at 1:59 PM

    I am keeping my fingers crossed for good news or helpful information. Something that will make this road a little more brighter.

    ReplyDelete
  9. JoJoFebruary 19, 2013 at 2:48 PM

    I am sorry for this unexplainable situation. Hopefully they will get to the bottom of this. Those test show clear +.

    ReplyDelete
  10. AmberFebruary 19, 2013 at 3:19 PM

    What a roller coaster ride!! Hoping for good news!

    ReplyDelete
  11. JustMeFebruary 19, 2013 at 8:34 PM

    I agree with everyone else. This is an unfair roller coaster of a cycle. Are you? Aren't you? What the hell is happening to you? How are you still focusing on life during all of this? All that being said, at least all of this drama means SOMETHING is happening and there is a chance?

    ReplyDelete
  12. ChickenpigFebruary 19, 2013 at 11:11 PM

    AAArg! That's just crazy! That looks like a positive to me.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Our Journey Through This Lovely LifeFebruary 20, 2013 at 12:00 AM

    Holy freaking moly!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  14. KanisFebruary 20, 2013 at 2:01 AM

    Nothing is fair when it comes to fertility issues. What a ridiculous roller coaster you've been on.

    ReplyDelete

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