Pick One

Rolled or folded?

I stared blankly at the nice lady with a confused smile on my face...I was experiencing a moment of sheer perplexity. My conversation at the till in a card and gift wrap shop at the mall had been very interesting and going well until it came to a sudden and abrupt halt. I was asked a question to which I was struggling to find an answer. The question was this…

“Would you like your wrapping paper rolled or folded?”

I'm sorry, what? Can you not start me off with something a bit easier like..."if a one legged hen laid an egg and a half in a day and a half, how long would it take a monkey with a wooden leg to eat a packet of Skittles?"

I felt unprepared for such an attack on my grey matter. After a long pause of bewilderment, and with a fleeting evil grin, I turned the question back onto her...

"Well, I really don’t know. What would you recommend?"

I could see her brain short circuit as she stood there with a blank, confused look. It appeared that no one had ever turned the question back onto her. After a moment of silence, she replied...

"Do you know what, I never can decide that myself" 

So, what should one answer? Well, let’s look at the options available in the world of gift-wrap...
  • I could choose to have the wrapping paper rolled. I could then carry it home, wielding it like a weapon, tripping people over as I walk by. I have discovered on previous occasions that there’s something special about carrying it like a baton that gives one an incredible sense of power. I suddenly transform into a superhero, ready for a robber to run out of the nearest bank so that I can whack him into giving up with my Christmasmey wrapping paper roll. I can take anyone on…oh no, it’s started to rain.
  • The alternative option is for the shopkeeper to fold the wrapping paper. That’s much more sensible, allowing me to easily fit it into my bag. However, when I go to wrap the gift, it’s going to end up with great big folds in it. Still, if I have it rolled then it’ll end up battered anyway. So, maybe it’s the best of a bad bunch.
Do you know what though? The real reason I can’t ever come with an answer to the question "would you like your wrapping paper rolled or folded?" is because I don’t care. That’s right, I don’t give a flip whether they fold the paper, roll it or make it into a giant paper hat so that I can wear it home. I mean, sod it, come up with something creative...“Would you like your wrapping paper rolled, folded or crafted into an origami swan?"

Which option would you choose?

Krismus Presentations via Etsy


  1. Now I definitely know that I am COMPLETELY out of touch with the world. I didn't even know that was an option.

    Love the wrapping paper in your picture though!

  2. What?! this is an option?! I would have been totally confused. But I would chose the weapon, the mall is a scary place and you never know when you might have to use ninja skills with your wrapping paper roll to get to your car! :D

  3. Never, ever heard of that before though I do want a wrapping paper hat now. I would have loved to see you wield it and trip people up though.


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