Hug?

Despite all of the turmoil in regards to the baby making aspects of my life...life itself marches on. 

i.e. I go to work.

Yesterday I went to a meeting. The attendees are all Very Important (I think) And then there's me.

I'm not exactly sure who decided I should be a part of this illustrious group, but I get paid to be there, so whatever. Please don't take my ambivalence to mean I don't contribute. Because I do. I nod my head vigorously and knit my brows together, giving the appearance that I'm paying attention and giving thoughtful consideration to what's being said. But really, I'm thinking who the hell are these people that I've met no less than four times?

On the way to the meeting, I ran into a fellow attendee. She is someone - whose name I actually remember - I know in only the strictest professional sense. We are polite. Cordial, even. But we are not chummy.

So it makes perfect sense that the following took place.

We say hello to each other. And then she extends her arm.


Which I naturally take to mean she wants to hug me. I mean, sure I think it's weird. After all, we're polite. Cordial, even. But definitely not chummy. Certainly not huggers. Then I think, maybe she's resolved to give more hugs this year. 

I...Lean...In...


I'm getting closer. It's almost time for our hug. And then I see her face.

She does not want to hug you! Abort! Abort! Do not hug her. Fall on the floor. Pee your pants, throw up....Anything but hug her.

I stand up straight, clear my throat, straighten my jacket and follow her gaze to the door we are standing in front of.

That door has been there the whole time. I bet you guys didn't even see it. Don't feel bad. I didn't see it either. But this woman, who I know in a strictly professional sense, did see it and was extending her arm to open the door to the conference room. She was not trying to give me a hug because of course she wasn't.I followed her into the meeting room where I sat very far away from her.

I spent the next hour nodding vigorously and knitting my brows together, giving the appearance that I was paying attention and giving thoughtful consideration to what was being said. But really, I was trying to telepathically Jedi mind-trick her into forgetting what happened. 

I don't think it worked, and I'm pretty sure that's the last time Very Important People will invite me to anything.


Comments

  1. Haa!! Oh my gosh. I am cringing on your behalf. Also laughing, but totally behind my hand so you can't see it. Thanks for sharing this. I feel a lot better about life now, knowing I'm not the only one doing stuff like this! :)

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  2. oh - I hate awkward moments like that - I'm sure she probably needed a hug but is too repressed to aquiesce!

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  3. ohhh, i hate when those moments take place. i'm so sorry. when you described sitting there and only thinking about what just took place - i totally got you - i've had that same exact feeling many times.
    sending love xoxo
    maria

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  4. Hey, it says a lot about you that you were about to hug the stern professional. I've had those awkward moments too but they tend to be with DH's clients. I go in for a hand shake; they go for the hug. Darn artists!

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  5. ha! oh, no! this kind of thing happens to me all the time, both because i'm awkward (i like to think it's in an endearing way) and because i am overly aware of people's disparate needs for personal space. and i think about it way. too. much. like, in just about every interaction that occurs before i figure out the rules for that specific person. how close does she want me to stand? do i sit right next to this person in this meeting or do i leave a chair in between us? is she looking at my like she wants to hug goodbye or is she more of a hand shaker? so much effort!

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  6. I'm an awkward hugger so even when someone clearly does not want one, if I've already gone in for one I just commit to it. I'm glad I'm not the only one with awkward moments like these. She should have just taken it from you since everyone needs a hug!

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  7. Haha oh my that's funny next time go straight in for the hug! And make it an extra long awkward one!! Those are the best!

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  8. I cannot stop laughing. I HATE these moments, yet I find myself in them way too frequently... Then I sweat all day worried about what the other person is thinking. Then, several hours later I realize they likely stopped thinking about minutes after it happened. Or at least that's what I tell myself!

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  9. I hate being hugged, so when I see someone looking all 'huggy' I brace myself. I would have totally done the same thing you did. I take any kind of open arm thing as a HUG ALERT! I wish I could wear a button that says "please, don't hug me".

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  10. As I was reading this I was replaying in my mind numerous occasions when this has happened to me. Except I went through with the hug. Then I try to over-compensate and talk a lot until the awkwardness has passed. But it doesn't....not really.

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  11. I feel your pain! That very same thing happened to me...but with a police officer...I'm dead serious.

    Still embarrassing.

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