All Grown up?

I'm in my late thirties and I feel like I'm still waiting to become a grown up.

The main reason is that most of the time, I don’t know what the hell I'm doing.

With each year that passes, I'm starting to realize that I can’t be the only adult who feels this way.

I remember my mom being my age and I used to think she had it all figured out. 4 young kids (the 5th came later on)  my dad away at sea a lot and she always seemed to have it together...figured out.

I don’t have most things figured out.

I just don’t feel my age.

I like to stay up late and I still sometimes use “totally” and “awesome” in the same sentence. Me? A grown up? Nah.

I think of my future child and I'm sure that he/she will instantly know much more than I do already. Then I start thinking they'd be better off being raised by wolves.

Okay, maybe not but you get what I mean.

I have a house, a wonderful family, a job, bills to pay, and a cat. I'm just waiting to catch up to my age.

Do you feel like a grown up or do you feel like you’re sometimes pretending too?


  1. I totally feel like I am pretending. I think about how close I am to 40 and think it can't be possible. I do not feel that grown up. So glad I'm not the only one!

  2. As I was walking out of the blood suckers office this morning I thought to my self, look at me by myself, going to give blood, by myself! to drive my truck by myself, and go to work by myself! & then I thought to myself ya duh your grown up you do these things every day! lol it's funny sometimes to think about age, and what it means to be "old" or "young" I have days where I feel grown up and others where I totally feel like I'm faking it! :)

  3. Before loss made my body feel wizened and incompetent, and infertility made me obsess about my age winding ever downwards, I used to feel like that all the time. Like someone might catch me out and all I'd be able to do was giggle uncontrollably about it. I still laugh a lot, but I'm trying to recapture that imposter feeling as much as possible. It was kinda awesome. Thanks for reminding me :)

  4. i definitely don't feel like an adult most days. especially when my friends and i get together...we laugh at how so much has stayed the same since our teenage years. :)
    sending love and wishing you a wonderful tuesday! xoxo

  5. I feel my age but that's mainly because of that freaking biological clock that's sounding in my head.

  6. I feel like an imposter all the time :) When I drop my daughter off at pre school I look around at the other parents who all look like they have their shit together, and I wonder, when am I going to grow up and have MY shit together? But then again, maybe they think that I have my shit together?


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