Rebel Yell

I'm pretty much a rule follower by nature. I fear consequences to my actions and therefore I make it a point to follow rules that most people find to be “optional”. Things like obeying the crosswalk lights even when there are no cars in sight, avoiding parking in a no-parking zone, only driving in the left lane on the highway to pass, and avoiding texting while driving are non-negotiable to me. And on the rare occasion I have been forced to break a couple of these rules due to peer pressure from evil influences circumstances beyond my control, I am ridden with guilt. This not only applies to society’s laws, but also rules of etiquette. I’m a stickler for doing the fair and polite thing such as limiting myself to only one piece of candy from the unsupervised bucket outside my neighbor’s home on Halloween night, returning my shopping cart to the cart return instead of parking it against another car’s bumper, filling in all blanks on a form including ones that are not applicable, and avoiding taking calls during a meal with friends or while in the checkout line at a store. Ask Adam about our trip to Niagara Falls and the peaches rule following put a damper on his peach eatin!

Don’t get me wrong…there are some exceptions. For things such as the ones listed above…my conscience precludes my need for convenience. I feel way too guilty to engage in the shameful behavior. But there are those “exceptions”. I don’t even really feel guilty for them either. I have no idea how these exceptions came to exist, but I’m pretty sure it has something to do with self-preservation in response to some unknown childhood trauma…or maybe the rising population of pygmy goats. Who knows?

So here it is…my confession…some of the things that I don't feel guilty about doing even though they are frowned upon socially and/or could potentially cause me to suffer consequence one day:

  • I take alcohol prep swab packets every time I'm left waiting in an exam room at a doctor’s office. I like to use them to clean the receiver on my phone or my keyboard at the office. But sometimes I don’t tell them. I justify it as being a perk of the visit. 
  • I have re-gifted. It’s not that I don’t sincerely appreciate the gift and being thought of, I really do. But what am I supposed to do? Be punished with the task of storing this unwanted item for who knows how long just to appease a guilty conscience? No sir, not me. I find that the gift giver would probably be happy to know (not that I would actually tell them) that not only did their gift serve the purpose of letting me know how much they cared, but also it will have the opportunity to keep on giving to the next lucky recipient. That’s chicken soup for the soul ya’ll.
  • If there are 2 cupcakes left in the box and one is all crumbly and smudged and missing icing in some places and the other is perfection…I will give the messy one to someone else. That’s right...I take the better one! HA! And you know what else…it’s not just cupcakes either. I take the cookie that’s not broken, the cinnamon roll in the middle and the apple with no bruises, and I leave the lesser quality food item for someone else. If there are only 4 slices of bread left in the bag and one of them is the heel…guess whose grilled cheese comes a little flat? Not mine! Does this make me a bad person?
I'm a Rebel by Little Minnow Designs via Etsy


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