I Caved

Seeing as I'm currently feeling rather blue and as a result of said blueness and Adam's absence this weekend (he's winter camping...silly boy) I've been sitting on the sofa curled under a blanket since o'dark stupid this morning, watching movie after movie. Combine that with the fact that I have an eye that makes me look like a vampire...I figured that I would finally cave and watch “Twilight”. 

First of all, yes...I did read the book and I did know that essentially it was about a teen vampire falling for a normal teen. So I guess my first question is, was the film supposed to be hilarious? Because I think I laughed too much. My second question is why was 90% of the film tinted blue-green? Was someone unable to read the light meter? or what this just me? And I guess my most pressing question is…

Why the frack was the vampire in high school? Homeboy looked straight-up 25.

Look, I get that if Edward wasn't in high school then there would be no book/movie. But dude had Luke Perry syndrome. This occurs when a lead actor, who is supposed to be in high school, looks 30 by the second season. It’s like, "Why is Benjamin Button hanging out with those teens?"

Josh Hutcherson - looks like a teenager.
Robert Pattinson - looks like my dad.

Okay, okay... I'm kidding, he doesn't look like my dad. But he could easily pass for a college kid. So why go to high school? Or why not cast a dude who actually looks 17? When Kristin Stewart asked him, “How old are you?” and he said, "Seventeen" I laughed. Then when the sun hit him and suddenly his shirt was unbuttoned, Desmond in "Lost" style, I laughed again and then even more when in the next scene his shirt was suddenly buttoned. I guess Vampires are too sexy for their shirts, too sexy for their shirts, so sexy they sparkle and shine like they've been coated in glitter body lotion.

I have no problem with Twilight really. I found it amusing. I sure hope the sequel is better though.


Twilight Inspired Painting by Tree Pea via Etsy

What about you...have you read the books or watched the movies?

Comments

  1. I've read the whole series and watched all the movies. Definitely loved the books. Thought movies had alot of room for improvement, but still enjoyed. I am team Edward btw, lol!

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  2. That would be a giant "No!". I like vampires and other nasty creatures to be bad ass. If I want a vampire fix I'll watch "Being Human" on Netflix.

    Why on Earth would an immortal being go to High School? Or college? Or have any interest in a moody teenager? I don't get it.

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  3. Yeah, I wasn't a fan of what the first director did to that movie and I was really hoping they would leave the sparkling out of the movies. It made sense in the book but I knew it wouldn't look good on screen. The first movie also gets picked on for everything looking so blue. I think the movies get a little better as they go on.

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  4. Ok, so I admit I read all of the books and watched all of the movies. I'm one of those people that once I start something, I can't stop. But yep. They are pretty bad. The only convincing part is Kristin Stewart as an emo-annoying teenager. Also, how creepy is it that a 300-year-old vampire likes to watch her sleep?

    And as far as the sparkling goes.... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qv1koHSUHkk

    That being said, I will say the last movie was the best one. It was worth suffering through it all. (or that's just me making myself feel better)

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